Churn reissue is out today.
With the added material, you can further hear the beginning of the band laid bare. These are the earliest sketches, and sound to me like scratches on a porch door from a dog that wants to be let in.
And you did. You let us in.
30 years later, and I am still grateful, no matter how awkward it is to look back. Listening to these relics is the audio version of stumbling across decades-old photos of myself. Hearing them forces me to come to terms with the kid in me who once wrote them. It’s a struggle, but also—and more often recently—a joy. At the end of the day, I’m still in the ring.
I dug up the liner notes from when we pressed a few copies of Churn in 2009, 15 years from its release. After re-reading, I made some new footnotes and included them with the originals, so we can all play along.
Yours,
JR
#1. Still here. Make it 30.
#2. I weighed about a buck-fifty, wet. Oof. No chance I’m getting into those corduroys.
#3. I still don’t know what I was thinking. Remember those vocabulary books in middle school? I loved doing them. I am SURE that Cumbersome was a word that must have been on a test somewhere. Now I hear someone say it on CNN or a conference call, and I just have to laugh. The only other artist I’ve ever heard use it in a song is Julien Baker, in “Sprained Ankle” on her perfect record of the same name.
#4. It’s called homage. I’m talking to you, Hetfield. Ya legend.
#5. Can confirm: 15 minutes of fame feels accurate. But I can still attest to the rare fan interaction in airports, during a surgery (true story), or on the streets of [insert the last place you think it might ever happen], or as recently as a week ago in an elevator. So, yeah, 15 minutes plus or minus a few years. Thanks to you all. X
#6. Our pal Deano, the owner of The College Delly (where Casey and I worked in college), lent us the $ we needed to rent a PA when we first got started for a gig at W&M.
#7. Opened for Live at the Boathouse. It was a really big deal getting to open for a national band as a local one at the time (unless you were Dave Matthews). No placentas yet. But later that summer, Live exploded on the charts.
#8. I probably don’t mention Casey enough. We were brothers back then on the road. He’d bail me out of a jam when I ran my mouth at some joker who could’ve kicked my teeth in, but more so, he kept me grounded during late-night bus sessions with his unique and relentless humor and his near-photographic memory. And weed. Lots and lots of weed.
#9. The first time we played TV was on the Conan O’Brien show—we had to learn a 3:30 version of “Cumbersome.” I remember 3 things: 1) How nervous I was (visibly!); 2) Carol Channing!; and 3) How kind Conan was. And so freaking tall.
#10. The last year or so of college, we had a residency at Traxx in Charlottesville. Sometimes we’d all crash at Pollock's mom’s or dad’s house out in Nelson County. Made the drive back to the Burg at 3 am a hundred times too. I loved playing there. Every show felt like we were getting somewhere, inch by inch, day by day.
#11. It’s still not clear how it ends. Maybe it begins?
#12. It’s been said that you should be careful what songs you write because you might end up having to sing them for the rest of your life. I owe this song a lot. I used to think that there are so many other songs I’d rather be remembered for, but what’s “being remembered” good for anyway? Who cares? The truth is, there are just other songs I would rather sing, songs that are easier to inhabit. That means more to me. But “Cumbersome” is a telephone line. It’s my internet. It’s how I reached out to you, and how you all first nodded back to me. It was my gateway drug to this long journey we’ve taken together. All these years later, it’s kinda like looking at an Apollo lander in a museum and thinking “they went to space in that?” But just as any good ship takes care of its crew, that song took care of me. I can’t help but feel gratitude anytime I hear those opening chords.
#13. See #8. We weren’t the Gallagher brothers, but we had our rows. Every family does.
#14. That guy was Chris Robinson. I believe what he said to me back then more now than ever. I'm a lucky devil. And I will keep adding my humble whisper to the “big song” as best I can when I release…well, we can discuss that another time.
This guy really could write anything. I get that he’s a songwriter but more so he is a storyteller. I look forward to reading his bts stories. Would read pretty much anything he wrote.
Best thing I’ve read on the internet in quite a while. It’s incredible how many lives that song has touched, and in some cases, molded. I will be grateful to you for writing that song, and for all of the opportunities that it has afforded, as long as I breathe.